Me: (woken up from disturbed sleep on couch) Huzzat? Wha?
Baph: (rather peeved being as sleeping on couch is agreed to be prime insult to other person in relationship) Why the hell are you sleeping on the couch?
Me: (groggily) because there was a monster in the bathroom.
Baph: (suspicious and still peeved) A monster?
Me: yeah. A monster…
Baph: (walking away, disgusted) yeah, right, a monster. Whatever.
MANY HOURS LATER:
Baph: (on telephone) Oh, I killed the monster in the bathroom this morning.
Me: (eternally grateful and relieved) You did?! Oh thank god.
Baph: Yeah, he wanted to take a shower with me.
Me: Ugh, was he nice about it, or nasty?
Baph: Nasty. I was thinking, “no!! You don’t get to shower with me! ONLY CASSANDRA gets that right!”
Me: UGH. *giggle*